Not too long after Dan and I became members of the Down Syndrome Association of Hamilton (DSAH), we attended our first ever DSAH event, which was the AGM (Annual General Meeting).
I'll admit, on the way to that gathering, I was a bit nervous for a few reasons. One, I was hoping to be nominated and elected onto the Executive Board, which was a bit nerve-racking in itself and exciting; and two, I had no idea what to expect.
I felt fairly confident in my beliefs and understandings about individuals with Down syndrome, and had spent many a blog post expressing the need for compassion and equality and celebration of difference in relation to Elyse and her peers. I had done my research and had exposure, be it fairly limited, to individuals with Down syndrome through the course of my life.
And yet, was I really ready to embrace the words I had so readily written? How would I feel when faced with a room full of people containing many children and adults with Down syndrome, and not just the "cute little babies"? I was worried my deepest, darkest, true feelings would reveal themselves, and betray me, and that maybe I was not that good of a person after all. I guess the best way of putting it is: I was worried I had too readily accepted Elyse for all that she is, without fulling knowing what that meant, or what I was getting myself into. I didn't want to have to 'need more time' to think things over. My daughter was here, and she wasn't going anywhere, and I didn't want anything to change my positive feelings about her. I had been forewarned, by several people when faced with my optimism, that this type of scenario - call it an 'emotional breakdown' - was likely to happen in good time.
To my relief, I felt completely normal and at ease with this group of people that took on the characteristics of so many other groups. There was laughter, there were some cries and a bit of chaos on that first day of meeting so many other families who have children with Down syndrome.
There was much celebration and food, and exchanges of information and an election where I was promoted to Executive Board Member at large. That part felt good, but what felt even better was being given the chance to serve an association that truly is there to help others, and rejoice in the common humanity of us all. That is what I saw that night: people. People having fun! People connecting and being in the moment. Just people - some of whom happened to have Down syndrome.
In truth, there have been some difficult moments, which I will likely share some day; and we all need more time to learn about something that is new to us. And, it does not make someone a bad person if they need more time and space to understand what Down syndrome means to them and their family.
But, as it turns out, nothing could ever change the way I feel about Elyse, because Elyse is Elyse, my daughter - not some baby with Down syndrome.
***
Skip ahead seven months to today.
I went into tonight's gathering, not with anxiety, but with much jubilance and anticipation! I was looking forward to seeing all of our friends, and to hopefully connecting with a few new families, and was fortunate enough to do both. Our Halloween Party, in my humble opinion, was a spooktacular success! (I couldn't resist!)
Ariel and Jeremy were passing this balloon back and forth - adorable. Jeremy was Thing 2 (along with his brother who was Thing 1) Ariel is a ballerina.
Genuine happiness
Ingrid, Alex & Jen - lovely! The Clown and the Pink Lady with a monster in the middle:)
Dinner
There were pumpkins for the kids to decorate
Ariel and Ella
We had a dance and karaoke. Here's Ariel dancing in the middle with the big kids. In fact, Ariel remained at the party with me when Dan took Elyse home, because, and I quote, "I want to stay and party!" Before the party, I left early in my witch costume to go help out, and Ariel cried the whole time I was gone because she wanted to go to The Witch's Party!
Mommy's a witch. Elyse was a ballerina who quickly changed into pyjamas.
Daddy, the Leaf's Player, with Lysie
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