Teeth are for Biting Apples, Not Mommies

You know when kids get ridiculously tired, and everything becomes HILARIOUS, and they're just moments away from massively hurting themselves, or another?
I had three tired kids today.  Our weekend was stuffed full of activity, if you will.  Dan had a work dinner, so I was on my own.
Elyse demonstrated her tiredness with lethargy.  I carried her from the couch to the dinner table to eat.  She could barely get the fork to her mouth.  She crawled up the stairs, and into bed fully clothed. 
Ariel played her tiredness cool.  She wasn't tired, she insisted.  Just grumpy.  For dinner I sauteed red peppers in olive oil, threw in a few leftover thanksgiving dinner carrots, a handful of spinach, some chopped up turkey, and bacon (BACON!).  I added leftover whole-wheat penne as the filler (the girls' favourite), and using tomato basil sauce as the base, I created a sort of pasta carbonara.  Sprinkle all of that with loads of Parmesan cheese, and believe me when I say, if I do say so myself, that dinner was delicious.  Penelope and Elyse loved it. 
Dinner, Ariel informed me, was terrible.  The worst dinner she's ever had, in fact. 
Foreseeing this exact reaction, I kept several plain noodles aside, which Ariel devoured.  There were steamed snap peas as a side, and I told her if she ate a balanced meal (i.e. ate some vegetables), there may be dessert.  We discussed the rationale behind this reasoning.
Then all hell broke loose.  I offered her a measly cookie, instead of the chocolate sucker she set her sights on.  To be clear:  she was never getting the chocolate sucker.  She stomped her feet all the way up the stairs, had no dessert, and that's how she got ready for bed.
Penelope was the kid that thought everything was SO FUNNY.  She pooed her pants.  Then ran away from mommy!  ha ha ha  After I wrangled her upstairs, and got the job done, she snuck up behind me, and gently sunk her teeth into my shoulder for half a second until I whipped around.
"What are you doing?"  Look of horror on my face.
"I'm BITING!" ha ha ha Runs away again.
I gently explained, "No, no, Penelope.  Teeth are for biting apples, not mommies.  We are gentle with people."
I brought her back downstairs, and while I was busy in the kitchen, she climbed on the couch, and sunk her pearly whites into Ariel's leg.  That's how Penelope went to bed.
In the end, all three girls cuddled into me for story time.  We read a few stories from Rebel Girls, and the picture book Ten Timid Ghosts.  Penelope may have bopped me on the chin with her hard head, bouncing in my lap, and Ariel may have whined to wait for her to get down from the top bunk before I start the story, and Elyse's eyes may have been more than half-way closed, but eventually we enjoyed our stories, and then they all settled down into sleep.  Now, finally - finally - I can go to bed.

Popsicles to beat the heat wave.  Ariel changed into jammies right after school.  Telling.