The problem with Facebook, Dan points out to me, is that nobody ever posts about that other stuff, those hard, real-life, parenting moments. Well some people do, but not nearly as much as everyone who posts their shining moments as parents - myself included. I'm okay with that. I like seeing happy families, especially when it's my own, but maybe I am guilty of not posting enough crappy pictures or blogging enough about when life gets tough.
Let me paint you an ugly picture. Me, elbows in a sink full of dirty dishes, used plates and cups littering the counter, bags under my eyes from lack of sleep, hair scraggly from lack of blow dry, clothing lacking shape, style and effort; Penelope, screaming at the top of her lungs, dumping her tomato soup on her head before throwing the empty bowl clattering to the floor. Tomato soup splattering up the wall. That happened today. Elyse, figuring out potty mechanics, sticking her finger in poo and smearing it across the floor. That happened today, too. Ariel completely ignoring me when I'm talking to her, looking right past me when I'm asking for help, and when she finally does pay attention - oh, and we're late for school at this point - she tilts her head back and shouts, "NO!" You guessed it, that also happened today.
I have more stories. These ones involve videos you will never see, because I deleted them.
Ariel received a toy camera from her grandma and granddad that can record videos. She has caught me on camera at the worst possible moments. The first time, I was fuming mad at her for some infraction, and I stormed around her room, lecturing her, rough-housing her books (which she was probably supposed to have picked up), having a mother melt-down, and she caught the whole thing on video. The next time, I burst through the door after a run, and I had to go to the bathroom so bad, and I mean REALLY bad. I was dancing trying to get my shoes off in a hurry, while my entire family watched me from the living room, and Ariel captured the whole thing on camera, following me right into the bathroom.
Yes, I can see my embarrassing stories are appealing to you; they are what make me human.
I could write about these things and complain, focusing on the negative, but I think why the happy stories always win out for me is because we're all looking for some kind of inspiration in our lives, and seeing and hearing about other people smiling makes us want to smile too.
But that's not what this blog was supposed to be about. It was supposed to be about how when Dan's away for work, I'm incredibly grateful for the things, big and small, that friends and family do to help me out. Now - wait a minute. Dan being away for work is part of my regular life - why should anybody help me out with my regular life? They shouldn't, but sometimes people just like being nice to a lady with three small kids. Like when my neighbour Julie said to me, "Hey Adelle, I'm going to come over tomorrow and hang out with your kids so you can go for a run." She didn't need to do that, but it was incredibly thoughtful and kind, and I'm thankful that she did. Or when Dan's parents said, "Let us know how we can help you out," and then they came and spent the time after school with the kids, and took Elyse to her dance class so I could put Penelope to sleep. That really helped me out. Now, I'm not looking for hand outs here, I just want to acknowledge that I can't really take care of my three kids, all alone, by myself, 24/7, and feel happy about it without any form of support. I mean, I can do it, but it wears me down. Single parenting in isolation gnaws at the soul. I'm sure there are other parents out there who feel this way. You are not alone! Take the helping hand when it's offered already! Forget about your dignity - you wiped up somebody else's poo off the floor today, remember?
Cheese...
Sure, they look cute
Back up has arrived
Thank goodness for grandparents
Penelope reaching for Oreo's water bowl, after successfully dumping its contents on the floor. Water everywhere. This is real life.
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